


My only question is this: who is she, exactly? Right off the bat, I want to know more about this dom-y zombie mommy. Not for the inevitable Resident Evil 4 remake tease. Not for the return to VII's first-person aesthetic. Whatever they want me to pay, however they want me to play it, I know that I'll be getting Resident Evil VIIIa8ge the very second that sucker comes out. I feel so, so blessed that Capcom is bestowing this gift upon me. From Twitter putdowns to cheap jokes, it's hard out here for a bottom. To be honest? I feel more valid and seen than I have in a good, long while. Whoever cut that trailer, whoever wrote this game knows that.

I'm about evil ladies who want to murder me stepping on me and looking at me with disdain. They know exactly what I want and what I'm about. But it's hard to look at a game trailer so specifically designed for hard-working, honest-to-god bottoms and not feel excited. If this is feeling a bit "garbage IGN article circa 2001" right now, I apologize. Related: PS5: Resident Evil VIIIage Is Real, And THAT Character Returns
